3.12 What cooperation asks of us

Imagine a mid-size city in the Midwest which has five youth-serving agencies which decide that they’d be more effective if they stopped duplicating each others services and formed a coalition to coordinate their efforts, with each focusing on what they do best.

So far, so good.

In their first meeting, they lay out a basic agreement. There are three foundations in town that sometimes show an interest in collaborative projects. The coalition members all agree they will apply to these foundations only as a group. No agency will apply separately for anything from them.

Four months later, they find out Agency X has applied to Foundation #1 and has secured a grant for their own work, while that foundation turned down the proposal from the Coalition, because “We’re only funding one youth service project this year.”

An emergency meeting is called. Agency X is told that this is a fundamental violation of the agreement. Agency X apologizes and promises to do better.

Now it’s two months later. The Coalition has gotten a serious grant from Foundation #2, but word comes that Agency X has submitted a proposal to Foundation #3 where the Coalition also has a proposal under consideration.

Here’s the conversation at today’s emergency meeting…

Cameron:  Stuart, we’ve call this special meeting to let you know that our coalition has decided to expel your agency. As of now you are no longer a member.

Stuart:  But why? But you can’t do that. You didn’t even ask us for our vote. You didn’t find out if we want to be expelled and we don’t. This is so cold kicking us out without notice.

Cicely:  We did give you notice. In our first emergency meeting, when you got that grant from Foundation #1 we told you if you applied again to any of the three foundations reserved by the Coalition then you couldn’t be a member anymore. Didn’t you hear that? Didn’t you read the letter we sent you confirming our position?

Stuart:  Yeh, I did hear that. I got the letter. But this is all moving too fast. We’re trying to do better. You have to give us another chance.

Carolina:  We thought giving you one chance was pretty darned generous, given what’s at stake here.

Stuart:  Well, these things take time to develop, you can’t expect a brand new coalition to work right out of the gate.

Colby:  We need it to work right out of the gate. Our coalition plan is great. We’re making very good progress. We’re on the road to delivering much better services to the youth in this city and their families. For the first time, we’re going to have a coherent system of services. This matters so much to us that we’re taking a stand for it. And we’re proud to take a stand for it.

Stuart:  You guys are being so cold. It’s like you’ve turned into some kind of tough guys without feelings.

Cameron:  Oh, no, we’ve got feelings. First and foremost passion. We’re passionate about our mission, and if someone messes with our mission, we get passionate about that, too. We don’t mess around.

Stuart:  I’m going to tell the foundations that you’re destroying the Coalition and that if we’re not part of it not to fund it because it’s not a coalition anymore and it doesn’t count if we’re not in it because we’re a youth-serving agency and we have a right to be part of any coalition in this city having to do with youth.

Carolina:  What gives you the right to be part of a coalition if you do abide by the agreements the coalition has made?

Stuart:  You’re being so tight.

Colby:  No, we’re following the discipline of cooperation.

Stuart:  What the hell is that?

Colby:  It’s the thing that makes coalitions work. Cooperative groups can’t work if the people in them don’t cooperate. It’s just that simple. If one agency breaks the agreement and goes after a grant on its own that’s “cheating.” That’s the word they use for it in the science of cooperation.

Cicely:  And there’s a big advantage to cheating. You get all the benefits of the coalition plus all the benefits of going it alone.

Cameron:  As long as the group allows you to cheat.

Carolina:  And if the group allows itself to be ripped off like that, well, that group is a sad case.

Stuart:  But…

Cameron:  Hold on, Stuart. Let’s play this out. We want you to get the full picture, so you can understand why we’re doing what we’re doing. See, if you cheat on our agreement, then either we have to enforce it, which is what we’re doing today, or what would happen?

Stuart:  Well, I think you’re being too strict. We’d continue to get by okay.

Colby:  No, what would happen is the rest of us would see that you had a serious advantage by cheating and why wouldn’t we decide to cheat, too?

Cicely:  Exactly, and then bye-bye coalition.

Stuart:  Well, you don’t have to do that. You could stick with the plan.

Carolina:  Wow, did you hear what you just said?

Stuart:  What?!

Carolina:  Are you saying you think you should get to cheat while the rest of us stick to the agreement?

Stuart:  Well, not exactly, but we have special needs.

Cameron:  We could each make the case that we’re special.

Colby:  And here’s the bottom line. If we don’t have cooperation, the real thing, not just lip service, then we don’t have a coalition. Then the coalition is just a pretense. A lie, really.

Carolina.  And believe it, we’ve got ourselves a coalition.

Cicely:  And that’s why you’re out. Is it really that hard to understand?

Stuart:  You shouldn’t be doing this. We’re going to make a bunch of noise about this.

Colby:  Really? That’s what you want to do?

Stuart:  We’ll complain to the City Council members and get them to take away your City money from each of you.

Colby:  Go ahead. Remember though, they already know our plan. We’ve met with each of them and they’re really happy about us turning our individual services into a collaborative system. So if you go ballistic, you’re the one who’s going to lose. That’s just a fact.

Stuart:  You guys are being really mean putting me in a corner like this. It’s not fair.

Cameron:  Look, this is dirt simple. We had an agreement. You broke the agreement. We gave you a warning. You ignored the warning. So you can’t be a part of our group anymore. You made your decision. Twice. This is not rocket science.

Stuart:  We should get another warning.

Carolina:  Come on, Stuart, think about it. If you were following the agreement and my agency cheated, you’d raise hell. You know that. You would.

Stuart:  Well…

Carolina:  You know you would.

Stuart:  You guys are being awfully cold.

Cicely:  No, we’re on fire.

Colby:  That’s right!

Carolina:  On fire!

Cicely:  We’re passionate about the mission of this coalition. We’re passionate about doing much, much better by the youth in our city. We’re not going to let anyone get in the way of that.

Carolina:  That’s what you’re seeing. And you know what? If we let you stay and cheat, we’d resent you, maybe even start hating you, and do you want that? We don’t. We don’t do resentment. We won’t go down that street, not with you, not with anyone.

Cameron:  Part one of our decision is that you’re out. Part two is that one year from today your agency can reapply to the Coalition. And if you can show us that you’re ready to cooperate 100%, no exceptions, then you’ll be voted back in. But you’ll really have to demonstrate in tangible ways that you’ve changed.

Stuart:  No, we’re ready right now. I didn’t understand before how serious you were. Bring us back in and we’ll see if we can do better.

Cameron:  I’m sorry, but our decision is final. And now we’re done.

Now you can see why I count enforcement as a nurturing thing, nurturing cooperation, nurturing mission, and therefore why I include it as an essential part of the Deep-Nurturance Operating System.